I withdrew emotionally, matching my physical isolation. I found myself annoyed at any attention and desperate to be left alone. The constant bombardment of doctors, nurses, cleaning people and other staff meant that I had nary a second to myself. And that was the real toll of being in the hospital it was really difficult to keep our relationship balanced. Every additional day in was a day that I wasn’t rebuilding my strength, or eating real food, or sleeping in my bed next to my wife. Scary as it may be, I was going to get out and sooner was better than later. From the album, 'A Quiet Storm', the ballad was Robinsons sec. The prospect of leaving that predictable schedule and care is unnerving. The Agony and the Ecstasy is a 1975 single written, produced and performed by Smokey Robinson. It’s like Red’s soliloquy near the end of Shawshank Redemption: institutionalization gets into your brain and becomes comfortable and safe. While this is a good thing, the 4 weeks of institutionalization fights against your better instincts. The prospect of getting released begins to loom large on the horizon. I was in such pain that the words rang hollow and I found myself in a pit of enmity.Ī funny thing happens when you start to recover. They all promised that it was a common side effect and that it would pass as soon as my new immune system took root. Everything hurt and there was a constant parade of doctors and nurses asking me to describe the problems which was just as painful. My diet deteriorated from normal hospital food to applesauce and oatmeal to popsicles to nothing. At night I would try to sleep slightly inclined to minimize my choking but could never get more than an hour of shut-eye at a time before I awoke in a coughing fit. A masterpiece in its own right, this novel offers a compelling portrait of Michelangelo. For nearly a week I tried every pain medication available to me (lidocaine, tramadol, oxycodone, morphine and dilauded) but to no avail. Celebrating the 500th anniversary of Michelangelo’s David, New American Library releases a special edition of Irving Stone’s classic biographical novelin which both the artist and the man are brought to life in full. My body started producing thick saliva that was constantly choking me. Eating, drinking, talking and swallowing became too painful. My throat was raw and swollen and incredibly painful. My tongue got more and more swollen and tender, as the mucositis set in and then migrated to my throat. It’s a common side effect of chemo where the fast growing cells in your mouth and digestive tract are killed off as by-catch. It looked ashen with solid white ridges outlining the inside profile of my teeth. To be so would be just as abnormal as to be unhappy 100 of the time. We have established then that we cannot be happy 100 of the time. We were born to feel our way through life, its agony, ecstasy and its in between. What we call positive and negative emotions. A few days after my transplant, my tongue started to swell. Love, peace, anger, pain, loss, happiness, joy, and so forth.
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